George F. Lang: The Budget-Conscious Ohio Republican Senator Who Looks Like He Escaped from a Wax Museum Fire

Ohhhh, Ohio. You just keep cranking ‘em out, don’t you? I mean, I’ve seen bad politicians before, but George F. Lang? This guy is like if corruption, ignorance, and a ventriloquist dummy had a love child and it grew up to defund special education.

Here’s the latest horror show from State Senator George F. Lang:

At a recent school board meeting, he actually said—out loud, into a microphone, in front of actual human beings—that kids with disabilities cost too much to educate. Too expensive! Burdensome! What’s next, George? Gonna start weighing children on a scale to determine if they’re "worth the investment"? Maybe bring back the old “leave ‘em in the woods” policy from ancient Sparta?

And, because he was clearly on a roll, he made it even worse by implying that disabled kids wouldn’t need so many resources if only they had ‘loving moms and dads who put education high.’

Ah, there it is. The classic, time-honored Republican strategy of blaming struggling families instead of fixing a broken system. The system isn’t failing kids with disabilities—their parents are! You hear that, parents? Your child has cerebral palsy? Well, maybe try loving them harder, and the wheelchair costs will magically disappear!

That’s how the world works, right?

"Government Spending Bad"—Except When It’s for Me

Now, George here is very worried about wasting taxpayer money. He hates it! Can’t stand it! Except, of course, when it’s paying his salary. Or when it’s funding corporate bailouts. Or when it’s lining the pockets of his donor buddies.

Let’s check the scoreboard:
✅ Gave millions to corrupt energy companies (House Bill 6).
✅ Voted to protect asbestos manufacturers from lawsuits.
✅ Advocated for “civil war” if his party lost an election.
✅ Was tangled up in a multi-million dollar fraud scandal in Butler County.
❌ Thinks kids with disabilities are too expensive.

So, to be clear: your child’s wheelchair ramp is “too expensive,” but bailing out multi-billion-dollar corporations? A necessary investment!

It’s amazing. The guy is like Robin Hood in reverse. Steals from the poor, gives to the rich, and somehow manages to look like a taxidermy experiment gone horribly wrong while doing it.

Speaking of Budget Cuts… What Happened to His Face?

I don’t want to be mean, but… actually, no. I do want to be mean, because this guy is actively trying to screw over disabled children, so let’s talk about whatever back-alley science project happened to his head.

George Lang looks like his face rejected a transplant and is trying to slide off his skull in protest. He looks like he told a plastic surgeon, “Give me the Jeff Dunham puppet, but make it haunted.”

His forehead is so tight, it looks like he’s permanently surprised that anyone is calling him out on his nonsense. He looks like a deepfake that’s buffering. Like if AI tried to generate a “generic white Republican senator” but got stuck at 75% rendering.

And the man is obsessed with cutting costs, right? Maybe he took that mindset into his plastic surgery consultation. “Doc, what’s the cheapest option?” And the doc was like, “Well, we could just smear some Elmer’s glue over your existing face and hope for the best.” And George said, “Sold.”

Ohio, We Have to Talk

At this point, who is voting for this guy? What is the logic? Do people in Butler County just wake up on Election Day and say, “You know, I’d love a politician who looks like he was left too close to a radiator and actively hates children in wheelchairs”?

Ohio, we can do better than this. We have to do better than this. We could randomly select a person off the street, and statistically, they would be less corrupt, less cruel, and way less likely to have a forehead that looks like it was stretched over a drum.

George Lang is not a leader. He’s a greedy, soulless, tax-dollar-leeching, wax-museum-escapee who just told disabled children they’re too expensive. And if that’s the best Butler County can offer, then Ohio is in serious trouble.

Do better. Vote better. And, for the love of all that is holy, don’t let this man near a school board meeting again.